I never thought this would happen! I met someone who is so totally amazing. I thought I'd never get over you. I thought you were the one. I was so wrong. How many tears have I wasted...cried in vain, prayed in vain. You spent the better part of a year telling me one thing and in the spanse of four days retracting it all?! Well I'm over you now. Some would say Im rushing things but I do what my heart tells me to do. I found someone with all the courage and passion to love me back and distantance doesn't matter to him.
You painted yourself "a nice guy" but you're not. I cryed, begged, pleaded with you and still you left me with tears and a broken heart. You had the audacity to come 2 weeks later and speak to me as if nothing was the matter!
You think you have a "thick skin" you don't. I tare down those walls with my words and you rebuff me because you know I speak the truth. You had no problem hurting me as long as you dont get hurt. Well now because you've callously disregarded my feelings you've lost a chance at love with me and you've lost a good friend.
I have a new love and I thank my lucky stars for him. He wants to give me the world and though I don't deserve the world, I deserve someone who thinks I do.
I'm done. It's over. Being your friend is a bigger burden than I can carry and I'm so sorry because you were a good friend to me but I want more than you're willing to give and I'd get over that if it weren't for how cruel you've been.
Goodbye.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
I'm Done.
Posted by Jerena at 11:45 AM 1 comments
Thursday, June 4, 2009
One Day at a Time is All I can Do
Today was almost an alright day for me then I started crying tonight wondering what I did that was so wrong that you had to end our friendship as well as whatever else might have been between us.
I know I stated before that this is not about me and I wasn't going to be selfish but I really didn't do anything wrong. You think I wanna feel this way?! I know you have feels for me because if you didn't you wouldn't have said the things you did. I know you're not in the business of leading people on. Whatever this is that's going on I hope you figure it out soon. I've been a good friend: loyal, supportive, encouraging, someone to talk to and laugh with. I'm unique and one of a kind. There's a million other girls who are all the same and if you let this pass you by you'll end up with one of these cloans and you'll never really be happy.
"How could you love me?" How could you even ask me this. I love you for the same reasons why you love me! I can quote you on every word you ever said to me. Once you said " I never met a girl [girlfriend] who could be my mate too...cos that's what I want." That's the ticket right there. We're friends. You see, I could never love a guy I couldn't be friends with either. So the reasons why I love you as a friend are pretty much the same reasons why I am so in love with you romantically.
Pretty soon I'll need some answers from you. I'll need to know whether or not I can move on or keep playin the fool.
Posted by Jerena at 11:43 PM 1 comments